Tuesday, December 6, 2011

merry christmas?

I love christmas, I'm a really festive person and love singing tacky christmas music and watching old and new christmas movies, curled up on my couch, usually drinking spiced imperial tea out my giant spotted teapot from whittards.

This year I will do as always, go to church/chapel/cathedral and light a candle in honour of my friend. My good friend, Lorna. We grew up across the road from each other in number 7 & 8 respectively, we went to the corner shop, got a quarter pound of sweets and tab clear, walked to school from there, chatting all the time. I can't remember what, but it was good.

We both moved away from our old area, her to somewhere nice with her mum & dad and me to somewhere less nice with my parents, but we still seen each other on christmas day, every year, come rain, snow or shine. It was a tiny Tradition for us, her christmas presents where always so much better wrapped than mine, I was always SO jealous of this. Every year I seen her though, regardless of if I hadn't spoken a single word to her throughout the year.

Then I found out she died, I can't remember who told me or when it was in the day but I remember being devastated at losing such an amazing person from my life and wondering what I could have done to change it, the answer was nothing, no one could.

I attended her funeral, payed my respects and left, christmas came and I didn't see her but I lit a candle in her honour, always as close to christmas as I can, as was our tradition, i'd do it on christmas day, but I can never find any where open to do it.

Then after years of remembering her with my candle i found out I was pregnant with My daughter, now I don't personally believe in tradition and naming children after people but I knew that if I had a daughter i'd want to again, honour my friend, I went, asked her parents if it was okay and when my daughter was born She became Rachel Lorna Murray.

Rachel grew up and wondered why her middle name was as it is, i explained and then one day she wanted to go visit Lornas parents, they gave her pictures of Lorna and we left, Rachel put them on her wall, she's just that kind of kid.

So this year again, I will go, light my candle and remember a truly magnificent person.

So yes, it will be a merry christmas because I will never forget my friend.