On seeing a few of my internet/actual friends had joined a facebook group for Feminazis from hell, for all the women out there who aren't typical women (as it were). I know a few amazing women who consider themselves feminist. In no way do I think that their choices are any better than mine, nor vice versa. But this is my take on it...
I'm not a huge feminist, I sew, I bake, I have a partner, I'm a student, I have a six year old.
Very much the "typical" female role in the household. On the other hand, I'm very much anti "girl" Not that being a girl is a bad thing, I'm just not that person. I don't live in an immaculate showhome and I never will, not with a 6 year old who has two giant guinea pigs, 2 cats - one long and one shorthair, plus a labrador.
The problem I face with being my gender is the child factor. The fact is I don't want children, and this may sound horrific but I was never the "having kids" type, Yet I'm so anti abortion I have my daughter. I don't feel the need to procreate, so i asked to be sterilised, Something which is such a huge decision in anyones life.
I thought long and hard about it, deciding the pro's and cons of it, I realised I don't want to be stuck attached to drugs to control my body to ensure I might not have a family. The fact of the matter is no contraception is 100% affective and the decision to not do it any more really made me happy.
It would mean that I can't have children at all, the very thought of which fills alot of women with fear. So I went to the doctors, made the appointment, got a referral where I was ridiculed for being 27 and not wanting to kids, how dare I make such a choice. The consultant is so sure that I will want a family that he refuses to steralise me until I'm 30, even saying he would bet me that I would change my mind.
I don't feel this was a very mature or professional thing to do, but me being the stubborn girl I am, took his bet. I absolute abhor losing anything, plus the more insistant that he is that I'll change my mind the more insistant I am that I won't.
My doctor says I should write him a letter, as apparently I was happy with this choice, to wait until I'm 30, but I just can't get the courage to do it yet, It's two years away, minus x months, I know in my heart that I don't want a family but it's still such a huge commitment.
I just thought I would share that with you guys, so thoughts would be nice :)
Julie
I'm raging on your behalf at the way you've been treated and I think you should ask your GP to refer you elsewhere. That's appalling!
ReplyDeleteOn the feminist note - I don't think it matters what you do in life whether you're a homemaker, lawyer, dole mole or whatever. I think what is important is that you have the opportunity to make these decisions yourself without pressure from society dictating how women should behave. In my opinion, if you believe that you have the right to work in whatever job you want, to wear what you want and to have the same standing as any man then you believe in feminism. It's just a scary label ;)
I've been told to write to them and complain, so I'm actually going to do it today. Big decision!!
ReplyDelete