Tuesday, June 15, 2010

it's all about me....

So hello, I think it's about time you got to know me and my family?

Before you read this, you should know, some of it may offend and or upset you and if this is the case there's not much I can do about it.

Well I do anyway

I'm Julie, I'm 28, I live in Paisley

this is my flat in Paisley

I play airsoft with my team at various sites around Scotland, they are called Sierra 8, I've been playing for about 2 years now and own a few rifles of my own, at the moment though I don't really play as we're skint!!

I also have just starting Marshalling for car racing and this weekend I am doing my first marshal at the Scottish Rally in Dumfries.

I'm fairly excited about this prospect, it could be a good career move for me as due to my age I'm not employable as an apprentice.

I have a 6 year old Daughter called Rachel, who i'll post more about next time, when it's all about her.

When I found out I was pregnant I was beyond devastated, I'm not hugely maternal and never really have been, something you're not meant to say as a parent, and especially as a female. You're meant to be wanting to have a family as apparently that's what everyone with ovaries wants to do.

I rarely tell people that I wasn't happy about becoming a parent and still shrug my lack of being all "mummy" off as my maternal instincts being lost in the post, as I'm aware just horrific it is to not want to be a mother, especially to your own child. I've grown with Rachel though and she's turned into a fantastic little girl, she's going to be a heart breaker when she's older!!!

The fact that I wasn't very maternal was written off as "PND" which I know can be a legitimate cause, but being forced to talk about it, when I knew I didn't have it wasn't a pleasant experience, midwives wheren't very accepting of the fact that at 21 I just didn't want to be a mum.

I wouldn't trade my daughter for anything or any money in the world, I also wouldn't want any more kids, even though my boyfriend is fantastic and would absolutely make a fantastic father, he's incredibly patient and calm.

Myself and Rachel at the beach, she's 6 in this picture and we're on the beach at Millport.

I have a big sister, she's 35, she's called Angela and at Christmas she got a nasty infetion in her leg and collapsed

Me and My big sister (she's on the left)

We used to knock lumps out of each other when we lived together, she's made some incredibly bad choices in her life, which are hopefully now getting better.

I have a wonderful boyfriend


He's 35, works at napier university and comes from an incredibly middle class family. I met him at airsoft and he moved in last September, well he came over to go on holiday and just never went home, I wouldn't part with him either. He isn't the typical guy I imagined myself with, or even thought i'd end up with, but He's great :)

I drive a mark 3 1995 VW golf, I called him George, I name everything, I don't know why!

I'm currently a level 2 qualified mechanic and next year I'm doing my HNC at Clydebank College, I'm hoping to go work for the AA and hopefully end up lecturing as a motor vehicle lecturer at some place good.

Hope that tells you a bit about me, and if it did upset and or offend you, then I'm sorry, I suppose, but the truth can hurt and being honest here was hard.


  1. I knew all of that :). None of it is offensive my love. You are just Julie to me!

  2. thank you for your comment, i was anxious about this one :S

  3. It's not offensive at all, controversial maybe. Not everyone grows up wanting to be a mum - not every mum wants to be a mum either. Its just a fact of life and at least you are truthful to yourself (and others) about it. I can understand why you were worried about posting this but I think you were very brave and it's obvious you love Rachel to bits. Good on you! xx

  4. Thanks Eileen, I found it hard, as people can be very judgmental, I wouldnt trade her for any money in the world!
    Im glad im a parent NOW but it took a long time

  5. I don't know many girls who were or are maternal at 21. I guess some take it in their stride and some don't. I wouldn't be ashamed of writing about it.

    Also if I knew there was a garage nearby with a female mechanic(or owned b a female mechanic even better!) I'd definetly take my car there. Garages intimidate me, so much so that I still get my dad to deal with it. Not enough ladies in your industry I don't think!

  6. I love being helpful mechanic wise, but people don't ask me!!!

    I don't know why :)

    Thanks for the new comment Jenny!